Well for those who don't know I am not a christian. Fact is I have a bit of a negative viewpoint on the religion more so for the Catholic religion for various reasons i can explain to anyone who wants to talk about it with me. I surfed to a few religions for a bit one of them even being a branch of Buidism . But thanks to some friends i found not just one religion but two that I relate more to than any other. While I do not think of myself belonging to to any particular religion. I mainly call myself a Shamanistic Wiccan. Meaning Identify with Wicca and Shamanism mainly.
With most people they feel only a mental link to where they live. They like it or hate it only based on what they think. But with me it goes beyond that. It goes down to a spiritual or metaphysical level. This is a tie to the land that you really cant describe unless you have a similar tie yourself. But anyways since i moved from my old home in Paradise, CA i have been feeling more and more detached from the land. It has lead to me feeling how to day it a bit off? As time goes on it had only grown worse. I came here to Florida cause something was calling me here.
I think what was calling me here was a job. A way to get on my own feet. While it was a very rough road and still a bit rough now and then i was able to do it. I no longer feel a call here. By call i mean reason to be here. I can't really say somewhere else is calling me right now i just know it is no longer here. I don't want to move back to CA but i do want to move. I need to move back to the type of environment i feel at home in. I need to move back to a nice Forrest in a small town near a big city if possible but not needed. I have never liked the city. Never have never will it just isn't for me.
I wouldn't say i am depressed but i would certainly say i am in a sort of funk. I just need to try to connect back to who i am. I need to find my next calling and follow it. But unlike last time i can not just jump into it like i did. This time will take allot more planning and effort to do. If anyone has any input on this or advice it would really mean allot. Just allot of things mulling around in my head.
It seems you find a need to label yourself with a certain way of thinking or believing. I just call myself a pagan which only means that I am not a Christian. Earth based spirituality is strong with you and so your need to find a tie with the land is important to you. You can feel this connection wherever you can take your shoes off and put your toes to the soil, sand, earth. I am not making light of your need to feel connected to your environment. I sincerely mean that our Earth Mother is wherever we are! Go to a park, or to a beach, and breathe in Her essence. Whisper your name to her so that she knows exactly who you are. I am quite serious. We must learn to bloom where we are planted. And where you are now is not forever ... you need never feel "stuck" there.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the honest reply. I myself don't so much feel the need to label myself or maybe I do I don't know. But the main reason is i find it easier to explain to people what i believe in. And while i do agree to an extent with you on earth based spirituality can be done from anywhere. But each type of environment has it's own feel to it's energy. And the energy here in Florida where i live just doesn't mesh with me like i would like doesn't feel like i want it.
ReplyDeleteAnd i know where i am now is not forever. I am trying to change it as soon as i can. But for the moment till i have a job lined up in where ever i feel the pull to move i am for now in essence stuck. Because as sad as it is the world is ran by money. Something i dont have much of so i cant just move and hope i get work.